Better, but still in need of a Car

Hello Everyone! It has been awhile since my last post and update. I apologize for that. Many changes have taken place since the last post. My husband has been working at a full time job now for about the past 8 months. We also Moved to a different town, closer to his job. We are still staying in a Motel, but it is a little better and a little more space. Our Car finally died, so now we are without transportation, but my husbands Supervisor has been getting him back and forth to work for now. Our son is still dealing with many problems, some emotionally and some physically as well as my health has gone downhill some. I now need a hip replacement and my blood pressure is high and I may have diabetes as well as some tests for cancer. Praying those come out alright, but still worried. We are in a better situation financially, as far as keeping a roof over our heads, but we still cannot afford a car at this time, so a Good Friend on Facebook asked about us starting a funding website again, and I posted about it on facebook, and I had a lot of Positive feedback from my Facebook friends who all told me to "Go for it", so I created a new YouCaring funding Website for assistance in getting a car. If my husbands Supervisor "Gets tired" of taking my husband to work and back, We will again be in a Position to be Homeless and we Have to do what we can to avoid that situation from happening. Please help support us, if you would? We would Truly be so Grateful and God Bless you All! 
To Donate and/or Share, Please go  HERE! 

It has Been awhile, but Making Some Progress!

This is The latest Update. Due to website issues, I could not update this until today. My Husband has been working now for about a Month at a Local, but Out of town, Cleaning Company. He really Likes his job. He does get paid weekly, so that helps. Our Son was Hospitalized last week for having a Breakdown again, but he wanted to go this time. They took good care of him and got him a Brain MRI test done this last Monday, and new medicines. The results are in, but they still are not sure if he has MS or another Neurological Disease yet because it showed some abnormalities, but not sure if that was caused from him moving around some during his test or not. They want us to get him in to see a Neurologist as soon as we can, so I am making him an appointment as soon as they straighten out which Insurance he is on. He is home(Motel) now, with us. I also found out that I have to get a hip replacement done, so I need to lose some weight, and return in 3 months to see about surgery. Things are getting done, just very slowly. We still have a bunch of bills to catch up on, and our car Desperately needs repairs done before it breaks down for good. We just do not have enough to catch up yet. It is so hard to pay on everything at once and everyone wants their money now, not later, but this is where we are at this time, and any help that we can get still, would Greatly be appreciated and would help us to catch up much faster. Thank you All for your Understanding and Patience with us and God Bless You! <3

DARKNESS!

All I feel is Doom! I am getting weaker and weaker by the moment! All I do is Cry all day long! I can't get this Blanket of Darkness off of me! I have fought and fought and fought and I have no fight left! People don't care out there anymore. Yes there is a few, but ONLY a FEW! No one Cares about Other Peoples Struggles and Just about EVERYONE has ABANDONED us! 

A Very MISERABLE and LONELY Christmas and NEW YEAR Holiday! This has been the Absolute Worst! The most Agonizing Holiday EVER! I AM SO GLAD that it is OVER! I Just wished my PAIN would go away! This Deep in the Gut Pain that will not go away!

I Don't Know what to do anymore! I Can't stop Crying! I am only writing this all down because it helps me a little, but It is a waste of time! I know it does NO GOOD! I Can't Sleep at night! MY Mind has too many thoughts. Bad, Scary Thoughts! I Feel like I am Dying and that the World would be better off without me! If I was never Born, I would Have No Family to go through this! To Suffer! I am So Tired!

To those FEW that Cared and sent us a few things, Thank you and I Love you for that! 

WOW! This will Touch Your Heart! How Does A Homeless Man Spend $100?

A Much Different Christmas!

Last Year, We had a nice Corner next to Our Fire Place, that Our Tree Stood! All decorated and The Christmas Decorations were put out all over the Living room and a Nice Christmas Wreath, hung on our door! We usually Cooked a Big Dinner either at My Mother in Laws or my Moms place.

Things are much Different this year. We have a 12 inch table tree, that a friend gave us, sitting on our table with some bulbs hanging on it in our tiny motel room.  I do not mind at all though, because we have a roof over our heads! Unable to get to my Moms and My Mother in Law is no longer with us, but with Her Husband in Heaven. My Daughter and our 2 Grandsons are staying with her Boyfriend, in a tiny apartment that hardly has room for anyone else, so I will go to my daughters boyfriends, help cook a Christmas dinner, and bring a few plates back to the motel room for My Husband, Our son and myself. It has been a Very Depressing and Sad time this Holiday Season, but I have been doing my Best at staying Positive and keeping My Faith in God. We all have. My Thoughts keep wanting to go back to the days where we Celebrated Christmas with the Families, but that wont happen this year. I am Very Thankful that I have my husband and son, and we get to see our daughter and grandsons on Christmas, but so much has changed and so much we miss.

We don't mind if we do not get Presents. Just to have Faith in God, some food, gas for our dying car, lol, Clean Clothes, and each other for support, is all that Matters.I see so many people posting about what they did or what they are going to do for Christmas, and I am Happy for them, Really. I do not want anyone to feel Miserable just because things are not that great for us. I want Everyone to have a Blessed Holiday Season. We will be Blessed in Gods Time and we already are! :)

We have had to swallow our pride this past year and it has been Very Trying! We had went through some tough things this last year and with that, I decided, really I had no choice, to ask for help on Facebook and Online. We have had Many shut the Door on us because of this, but in return, We have met some of the most Kindest, Compassionate and Understanding People to walk the Earth! A Couple of Friends sent us a box of clothing and a few needs for us and It felt so good to be thought of! I Hope to repay the kindness someday. I Thank God Every Day for putting them in our lives, because this has kept us off of the streets and has kept a roof over our heads, some food to eat, and now working on getting our car repaired! To me, We Already had Christmas All Year Long and My Heart will Always Remember each and Every one of you who has helped us survive! We Truly would not be here today, if it was not for these Caring Human Beings that I Now Call My Friends! Christmas was not so Lonely because of you few Special People. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to All of you and Please just Remember to Always Count your Blessings! :)

A NEW Path to Travel!

It has been a while since I updated My Blog. I do apologize. We are still at the Motel, Thank God for having a roof over our heads. My husband has been working Part time at a local  Restaurant and we have barely been able to stay here, but we have. Our car is still running, barely, but still running. We have had our ups and downs. Days without food and gas for the car. Not able to Wash our clothes at the local laundry mat, but washing them out by hand. But in the Midst of all of this, I had received and email from a Facebook friend, who Happens to be an 8 time Best Selling Author and Publisher, and she offered her mentoring services to me and asked if I was interested in Writing a Book!

I have never written before, other then this Blog, some forums, and posts, and a few small poems, so to write a Book, or to be Part of a Book, is Very New to me. I am Excited, but Nervous at the same time. I need to be stronger then ever to do this, because I have to have Confidence in myself and change my Thought process altogether. I try to stay Positive Most of the time, but do have my down days and sometimes share that with my online friends and even in this Blog.

I am now listening to some Inspiring Videos that will help train me to Stay Positive even through the darkest of times. I need to learn how to shut down that voice that keeps reminding me of how much we lost and how bad our situation is, and that is so Hard to do, but I know that I can and will accomplish this. We will never forget, but to learn how to Cope and Move on, is A New Beginning and will Create a New Path in Life which will, in return, open up a Brand New and Much Better Way of Living and so many Possibilities and Doors will be Open!

I am Asking For Your Help Please!

Things have been going well the last couple of weeks. My husband finally started his new job and the Motel had been letting us stay here up until Now. We had also, finally received Assistance with food after a month and a half, battle with the Human Services dept. But this Morning, we got a phone call from the motel management saying that if we do not come up with some of the past due money that we owe here, we have to be out this Monday!

We have an Arctic Cold front coming in this week, and living out in our car could be life threatening! This will Really Happen to us if we cannot find any help!

I came up with a Plan, if some of you are willing! 

I CAN VERIFY THIS! I am asking you All for a Huge Favor Please! If you are willing to Shop at either one of these Companies, My Commissions will prevent us from being on the Streets as of Monday! This way, it is Not a Handout! You get some gifts to give or keep for yourself, and we, in return, get to keep a Roof over Our Heads! My husband is working, but the Motel we are staying at cannot wait two more weeks until My husband gets paid. We Will be So Very Grateful! I am willing to work for this! If you would Please Share this, It May help! Thanks So Much!

http://www.wagonwheelcompany.com/#a_aid=shellyhargis

https://www.jewelryincandles.com/store/shellyscents

If you could help and do some shopping at these links, Wagon Wheel pays every week directly to my Paypal account, and Jewelry in candles Pays every 2 weeks into my Paypal, with the next pay period coming the 15th of this month! 

Please help if you would or Please share this! We would be So Grateful for this! :)

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Change is Coming!

We had such a Bad day the last few days, but Change is Coming!

I can feel it as much as I am breathing! Things are getting ready to change and I just know it! It may be Tough at the moment, but Something is in the Works for us and it is going to be So Good!

I have been working as hard as I can with what little that we have had, to get something going on the Internet, but nothing is really working well! I get a few Commissions here and there from JIC, but other then that, Nothing! But that is all about to Change!

I have been disappointed by many programs with many promises, but I can actually see people getting Cycled and Paid in the Group Constantly so I know that this is Real and I trust Josie completely!

I have found someone who Truly cares about Others who are struggling! Her whole purpose with her program is to help the Homeless and the Struggling, get back on their feet again!

I have chatted with her personally and I soon will be earning from this and what is so Wonderful about this, is that this Program is helping so many Philippines whose lives were Devastated by the Super Typhoon, Yolanda and Many, Many others as well!

The administrator of #WealthForPH or #WFP4Life, is dedicated to helping these Strong and wonderful People who has lost Everything! I Truly Admire and respect her! 

Things are Changing for many right now as I am writing this, and I am on this list and we will be getting on Our feet again soon! 

When this happens, I will be Paying it Forward to help others who are struggling! I have wanted to do this for so long, and it Will Happen Soon! :)

It's NOT Your Problem! Is it?

NOT a good start to the day! Everything that could go wrong, pretty much has! I am just Venting right now! I need to or I will Break Down again! I know Nobody Cares or will Read this anyways!

 I am so tired of everything having to be so difficult! We still have not received Any assistance from Human Services! My husbands New Job won't start him until Next Saturday, so that threatens us from having to leave the motel now! We are HUNGRY! Have NO WAY to WASH our CLOTHES! NO GAS in the CAR! The Car itself, is getting ready to Break Down! I just want SOMETHING to GO RIGHT SOON! 

Yes! I KNOW!! I am supposed to appreciate what we do have, which is almost NOTHING, and I do. but that does not make it any easier! I do know that God has seen us through so far, but I do need to Vent!

We are not on the streets YET and we woke up to another day, but this is SO HARD! I PRETEND EVERYTHING IS FINE, so Everyone is HAPPY that way! But it is not, so Sorry to Disappoint You All! I am SO SORRY to Ruin your Day!

Negative into Positive!

I spoke earlier in my Blog about learning lessons from the hardships that we may experience! Well, Although I am still learning everyday and riding that "Emotional Rollercoaster" at times, I did experience a New Passion about "The Homeless" after we became Homeless!

We started attending a small local church in town and learned about a homeless program while we were there and contacted them for help, and after they helped pay for a couple of nights at the Motel for us, I decided to volunteer, only once so far, at this local Homeless Project called "The Jeremiah Tree". I was so happy to be a part of it and wanted to do more, but still, I wanted More people to get involved! This gave me the idea of wanting to get more online Awareness and, although I was not the first to do this, by far, I had to do something! I decided to Create an Online Community on Google+ to help Raise even More Awareness of this Homeless Problem that we do have in America! 

I was so tired of being "The Victim" all of the time, and although I still get down and we do need help at times, I wanted to do something Positive with Our situation! I also decided, after several people encouraged me to write about our story, to start this Blog. It helps to be able to express my feelings and tell about what our experiences are as we are living them day to day. 

I am Very passionate about this, but found out that Many are not! Homelessness is Not what people want to hear about! It is something that many do not care about! Some don't even acknowledge that it exists or refuses to see it! People are More passionate about Saving the Animals, Trees or the Enviornment then they are about Saving Human Beings and this is so Sad! People have their Priorities all screwed up! I care about all of those issues, But a Human Being should be First on the list! Atleast that is the way I see it and Believe Me! If you was to suddenly become Homeless, and it can happen to you too, You would change your views on these things! I Promise You that!

I do hope to Create Something Positive out of this Situation that we are in now, and I  hope to use our Negative Experiences as a tool for Something Lasting and Positive! 

Please Visit My Google+ Community and add your Local Homeless Resources!

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A Visit from another Angel!

I woke up a little late today, since I stayed up so late last night, feeling restless and hungry. It was a slow start to the morning, but finally got a message from a friend of my husbands, saying that he would be over. he showed up around 2 or so, in the afternoon, and brought us all a bottle of pop, which was so nice of him! He also loaned my husband a little money, so that we could get something to eat! 

We was so appreciative and we were so hungry! lol. It was such a nice thing for him to do! He hung around and talked for about an hour or so, then left. We drove up to the grocery store and bought a few groceries. What a Great feeling it was to buy some food! We came straight home and ate! 

God comes through in so many different ways! This was truly a Blessing once again! My husband will be starting his new job sometime soon. They hired him, but told him that they would call him in the next couple of days to come in, we are just so Thankful for this Job! 

It was nice to have a Visit from a friend! We do not get those anymore! Most have forgotten us or abandoned us now! Every once in awhile, we get a visit from an Angel desguised as a friend or someone who has helped us!  We always have God though, and a couple of friends left to believe in! I also have a few relatives left that do love and care about us, but just are not able to help us at this time. The rest, too, have abandoned us, but that is Ok. We will make it through, because we always have atleast One Visitor! 

Another Sleepless Night!

I hate when I can't sleep! This is happening more often lately! I stay awake, my eyes open, because when I close my eyes, the race begins!

Thoughts of Everything pouring in, like a Faucet turning on! I think of Everything that we lost, and then try to convince myself at the same time that I need to stop thinking of those things! They are Gone Forever! We cannot get them back by thinking about them, but I want to hold on to those thoughts sometimes! It is so hard to let it go! The sick feeling just wants to linger as I try so hard to ignore it. A constant Battle rages back and forth as I fight with my thoughts! 

I just want peace of mind again! I don't want this Reality anymore but I know that this is Real and We have to face it everyday! Another day has passed. Broke! Hungry! We need so many things! Clean Clothes! The Car problems! Bills! Catching up! Getting further behind! If we will Ever catch up and be able to start over! We are so far in the hole, How do we get back out again? My Health! My Husbands Health! My sons and Daughters Health! My Grandsons Health! Our Future! The What Ifs! The Regrets! The Mistakes! The, If I could do it overs!!!!! Racing! Racing! Racing in my head!

Just One More Time! Just One More Break! Just One More Chance to do it Right this time! 

Trying to Keep My Head Above the Water!

Broke, No Clean Clothes and Hungry again! My husband is Doing his Second part of his test today at his new job, then will start this week hopefully! Until then, the Bills are piling up. I feel like I am Drowning Sometimes! It feels like the walls are closing in! We are getting Closer to things getting better, yet this Dark feeling of Gloom is tapping on my shoulders again! It is a Surreal feeling and it is not good, yet I fight it as best as I can. 

We will owe the Motel atleast 2 weeks and we have to keep gas in the car and the car running! It can be Very Overwhelming! We haven't had much help at all lately and so it has been really hard to keep our heads above water! 

I have been working Hard on My Internet Programs trying to earn some money, but it is slow! Hoping things will pick up soon! It is keeping my mind and My Stomach occupied some to just stay busy! I have this Blog, 2 Google+ Communities, facebook and my online programs to keep me occupied for now! 

We are So Very Thankful for everything that we have gotten help with and everyone who pitched in here and there! We would not be here still, if those who cared, did not come forward to help us and we are So Thankful that we do have a roof over our Heads and still a little bit of canned food left!

We just Pray for another small Miracle so that we can make it until My husband starts bringing in a regular Paycheck! God is Good All of the Time and he will Make a Way Somehow! He Always has! 

Knocked Down to Earth!

Eventually Everyone gets knocked down to earth sometimes. We are supposed to learn a Great lesson in that and not be Too proud and to Appreciate every little thing that we have and to Never take things for granted again! Especially each other!

Those who have NOT yet experienced what it is like to be "Knocked Down", do not know just how Fortunate we are! I know that sounds Crazy, but it is so True! We learn things that some will never acquire in life because they did not experience, or have the Opportunity to experience what it is like to hit rock bottom.

When life knocks us down, our Sight Changes. Our train of thought changes. Our Appreciation of even the little things Change. Our Eyes are Truly Opened! Some will go through their entire lives without these Gifts and it is a shame, really. Don't get me wrong!  I do not wish any bad on anyone, but some will Always be blind to these things. They will Never Truly appreciate what they do have and will always take things for granted. 

Something as Meaningless as an Oven, or a Bed or Dishes and Pots and Pans. A toaster, can opener, coffee pot, Your own bedroom, Privacy, refrigerator, microwave. A garden, neighborhood, garage, driveway. Safety, Security, Warmth, Blankets, Coats, Clothing, Shampoo, toothepaste, deoderant, personal needs, Hot Meals, Home cooked Meals. I can go on and on and on! These and many more things in life, So Many of us take for granted! 

Friends and Family are another thing that we take for granted. But that is another learning Process in itself! When you Hit rock bottom, you definately will find out who Truly Cares for you And you will DEFINATELY Lose alot of "Friends and Relatives" along the way! When you get back on your feet again, I am sure, many of them will try to come back! (After the Storm has Cleared!) but that is Human Nature Sometimes. 

The Moral of this Story? Take in Everything that you Learn from this Experience of being at the bottom! Use it in the Most Positive Way that you can! I am trying to! I still get down at times, of course. We all do and will, but what is the most Important thing to remember out of all of this is: GET RIGHT BACK UP AGAIN!! It won't happen overnight, and some do expect it to, but as long as you are Moving Forward, You are Going the Right Way!